unclefather:

"Thanks for calling me a bitch because a bitch is a dog. Dogs bark. Bark is on trees. Trees are nature. and nature is beautiful. So thanks for calling me beautiful(: "

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nialls-genitalls:

Me when I’m the next one to present in class

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pornhubhemmo:

Imagine watching an episode of Catfish and seeing someone use your pictures to catfish someone else

dokibots:

haha! have fun at highschool today NERDS. i’m gonna be doing cool ADULT stuff like sleeping WHENEVER i want and CRYING 

joeyjoe69:

when ur left alone in an unfamiliar room

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britney2007spears:

me: this celebrity is kinda good :-)!

tumblr: but… probematic! *brings out 116 receipts*

me:

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hotsenator:

honestly me right now

meta18:

aphdenmark:

when will ppl shut up about that ice movie

ice age was good fuck off

The Signs thoughts

12-stars:

Aries: I’m better than all of you assholes

Taurus: I could eat some cake right now.

Gemini: I’m going to pretend I care about what you just said

Cancer: I need hugs and cookies.

Leo: Fuck u bitch I’m fabulous, bow down to me. 

Virgo: You’re all uncultered swines.

Libra: Stop war hug more

Scorpio: I tired of your bullshit, I just wanna sleep

Sagittarius: I wanna fuck your girlfriend

Capricorn: Sex sex sex sex sex sex sex

Aquarius: I’m hot and gay.

Pisces: Fuck my life.

-annoying:

me when listening to chandelier by sia

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